Tuesday, November 17, 2009

My Spiritual Journey

I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you shall be clean from all your uncleannesses, and from all your idols I will cleanse you
Ezekiel 36:25
Meditating on God's word is powerful and life changing. This week I spent the week meditating on vs. 25

"from all your idols I will cleanse you."

Idols. Those things that you worship in addition to or more than God. These words were clearly impressed on my heart, so I knew God was calling me to take time to sit with him so he could reveal some idols I had formed in my heart. I was expecting Him to tell me I had started making my kids or my house or my ministries an idol. I wasn't expecting Him to tell me this, but plain as day, He said

You are your own idol.

Me? How could I be my own idol? I am sacrificing everything I used to want or desire in order to stay home and raise and disciple my children. I'm giving my life to what God called me to. How can I be an idol?

As the week has progressed, the answer became pretty clear. Why do I get frustrated when nap time isn't what I want it to be? Because I feel I have the right to some down time during the day. Why do I get angry when fits are thrown or toys aren't picked up or when sleepless nights begin to become the norm instead of the exception? Because I feel I have the right to expect perfection from others and sleep and alone time for myself.

My dissatisfaction with things comes because I believe deep down in my heart that I have the right to have an easy life full of fulfilling opportunities for myself.

My desires, or what I feel are my rights, have become my idols. They have become the thing I chase after more than I chase after God.

My rights have been submitted to the proper authority and my focus is on chasing after God even in the midst of a life full of dirty diapers, tantrums, messiness, no alone time, little money, an adoring husband, kids who love me, a house with very little things that need fixed, friends who call to check on me, a mom who drops everything to support me, and sisters who bring great joy to my heart every time we talk.

Idols make it really easy to focus on what's missing in life. God makes it really easy to focus on how much He has blessed my life.

Meditation on God's word is powerful.

This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success. Joshua 1:8

Goals for this week:
  • Finish Life with God by Richard Foster
  • Continue memorizing and meditating on Ezekiel 36:25-27
  • Focus on daily submitting my rights and chasing after God.

1 comment:

BrendaBalogh said...

thanks for sharing this Kari. Have you heard "clear the stage" by Ross King? This is a song that we played during a call to response at the girls retreat, it's awesome and goes well with what you are writing here about idols. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p6MvZLDBFpU